Even BIllionaires NEEd
hand-crafted fiction written for titans of industry, Bilderbergs, and oligarchs
From the original publisher of Lord Vishnu's Love Handles and The Worthy comes The Neon Palm of Madame Melançon, the first novel ever marketed for the sole amusement of the billionaire class. While perhaps the most expensive e-book ever created, this luxury edition of Will Clarke's mind-bending mystery is also the inaugural reader selection for our Billionaire e-BookClub®. The Neon Palm of Madame Melançon e-book debuts at $9,999.99. While this price might be out of reach for even most millionaires, this precious 1st edition e-book is chump change for our target demographic. For mere plutocrat peanuts, you can now read an e-book written for the minds of Elon Musk, Ivanka Trump, Peter Thiel, and that guy who owns Chick-fil-A.
Only a fraction of the cost of a presidential weekend at Mar-a-Lago, A Birkin HanDBag, or a Russian Pee Pee Party
(wink, wink, tinkle, tinkle, comrade)
You see, Ivanka and Chick-Fil-A guy, Will Clarke's luxury-priced sci-fi adventure was designed specifically for people like you, people who demand only the finest, people who have, up until now, been forced to download poor people e-books onto their gold-plated Kindles. Our exquisite little novel fixes all that—finally a luxury e-book for people who want to "suck out all the marrow of life."
To those of lesser financial means, we do realize that spending this kind of money on a novel may seem extravagant, maybe even frivolous—what with the water in Flint, Michigan and the money you will soon need for your healthcare. But one day, we may come out with a regular-person editions for non-billionaire types (think Tesla in five years). Now move along. Millionaires and below shouldn't even be on this site. Go read The Robb Report or go pretend you're Robin Leach or something. We are talking strictly to billionaires here.
Billionaires! For you people Who Change Things—you crazy ones, you square pegs in round holes
Middle Finger Press is committed to acquiring only a top 1% readership. We are striving to break the barriers of price, literacy, and even decency with our Billionaire e-BookClub® 1st editions. In fact, our exclusive e-books are specifically targeted to the minds bold enough and the hearts brave enough to put dents into universes.
For you people—you crazy ones, you square pegs in round holes—truly are the ones who control our future when it comes to climate change.
You are our only hope.
The robots are coming, boys and girls, our antibiotics are failing, and it's getting hotter every day. So let this science fiction novel be the first place to spark your desire for a brighter future. We need your help to save this small blue planet. We need your imagination and your dreams, and most of all your empathy. And that surprisingly enough can start with reading small works of fiction like the ones we publish. That's the thought anyway.
BookS Make You Richer
on the inside
has been scientifically proven to increase empathy